Empathy

Volunteering and giving back more than one receives—these values were instilled in me from early childhood. I grew up in a household with two working parents, and my two grandmothers were my primary caregivers. Each of these remarkable women exuded goodness. Charity wasn’t something they did; it was part of who they were.

Later, marrying Jim—who, as many of you who’ve met him know, has the most generous heart and is a giver through and through—deepened these values and shaped our way of life together.

Fast forward to today, as Jim and I navigate this road called metastatic disease. Early on, I was fortunate to find a community of extraordinary people. I listened, I learned, and I worked hard to find my niche—a way to live out the principle that has always guided me: give back.

Now, three years post-diagnosis, some call me a mentor, others an advocate. In truth, I’m simply a friend. A person who cares. Someone trying every day to share what I’ve learned, what I practice, and—above all—the message of hope with my sisters.

Just yesterday, I was on the phone with a friend walking the same path. She faces the same challenges and wrestles with many of the struggles I’ve encountered. My message to her (and to many of you who’ve heard me say it countless times) was simple: Control what you can.

Today, as I begin a Phase 1 clinical trial—side effects yet unknown to me and 890 others around the world who are helping to forge new ground—I’m thinking of all my sisters, brothers, and friends who are cheering me on.

 Thank you for the texts, the calls, and the messages. In short, for your warm, continuing empathy.

You are there for me, and I feel your support in my heart.

A quick health report

Many of you—our kind friends and family—have been asking, so here’s a quick update on what’s happening with me these days.

 This past week I finished my third month of targeted chemo. My schedule is three weeks on and one week off to give a chance for my body to recover and then we start all over again. I met with my oncologist last week. The tumor marker blood test shows slight improvement, which is great news. We celebrate what we can. My oncologist is also battling my insurance provider to get approval on an FES PET Scan, newly FDA-approved. This diagnostic test will help us decide if I’m on the right treatment or not. Please wish us luck on that.

I was also approached by METAvivor.org to be featured in the month of October for their Patient Voices campaign.

 This is what the organization is all about. METAvivor exists to sustain hope for those living with Stage 4 Metastatic Breast Cancer (MBC). We are a volunteer-led, non-profit organization that funds vital research to help improve the longevity and quality of life for MBC patients. Passionately committed patients ourselves, we rally public attention to the urgent needs of the MBC community, help patients find strength through support and purpose, and make every dollar count as we work with researchers to extend and improve quality of life for MBC patients.

 100% of breast cancer deaths occur because of metastasis, and almost 100% of the people whose breast cancer has metastasized will die from it. In the United States alone, this means that more than 40,000 vibrant lives are lost each year.

 Despite these stark realities, the popular breast cancer fundraising movements give on average only 2-5% of their research funds to researching metastasis. Instead, their primary focus is on prevention, which does nothing to help those already diagnosed, and early detection, which does not impact those facing the ultimate death sentence of Stage 4 breast cancer. And while only 6% - 10% of initial breast cancer diagnoses are metastatic, 30% of the patients diagnosed with earlier stage breast cancer will eventually develop Stage 4 breast cancer and die.

 This does not need to happen.  Many metastasis researchers believe that metastatic breast cancer could become a chronic, rather than terminal, disease if only there were more money to do the research necessary to develop effective treatments.

 Please visit www.Metavivor.org if you’d like to learn more, and I’ll make sure to share my video with you during the month of October.

A friend has been kind enough to set up a GoFundMe fundraiser.

Here is the link to that page.